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Has anyone ever noticed a surprising amount of rumors and misconceptions about grandmas? While most of them aren’t intended to be of malice, they can still hurt our hearts, especially since being the best grandma we can be is all we really care about. Let’s set the record straight, shall we? It’s time to debunk a few of these common rumors, including:
1. Grandmas can take care of the kids at the drop of a hat
We love our grandkids more than anything in this world and want to spend as much time with them as possible. However, we also have other things going on, whether it be work, travel, or something else we already have scheduled. While we want to help as often as possible (trust me, it’s our pleasure!), we prefer to be asked instead of told and to have our time and availability respected.
2. We can and should provide regular childcare…
Once again, we want to help as much as possible, but I have talked to many grandmas in my day who quit their jobs because they felt they needed to provide childcare for their grandkids. If this is not your situation, that is fabulous! If it is, I also get it – daycare is expensive, and you may not be familiar with the providers, which makes you feel helpless and concerned. You want to help your children and grandchildren, but remember that you are also entitled to make your own decisions based on your health, lifestyle, and finances. Speaking of finances…
3. …For free
…Again, I get it! Inflation is awful, and you want to help your kids whenever and however you can. But watching a child regularly is a full-time job that, I believe, calls for some compensation (especially if you left another job to help out). This is a case-by-case, family-by-family decision, but it is something that many grandmas have approached me about that needs to be discussed more often.
4. We judge our children’s parenting
We know our kids are doing their best, and we love the little humans they’re raising, but sometimes we cannot help but put in our two cents about various things. I’m sorry! I promise we aren’t judging – often, we think we are making things easier by offering advice, but we can see where it may come off as judgmental.
5. We have all the answers
Yes, we have raised our own kids into adulthood and have wisdom from our many years on this earth, but we don’t have all the answers – especially in this day and age! However, we are happy to share our knowledge and offer advice when asked. (See? Even I have improved since #4!)
6. The “other grandma” is our sworn enemy
Okay, maybe this isn’t a lie… Hehe, kidding! How lucky are our grandkids when they have two devoted grandmas to love on and dote over them? I loved both of my grandmas and am happy to see my grandkids have the same loving relationship with theirs.
7. Grandmas have deep pockets
If you are a grandma who invested wisely and can support her family financially, that is wonderful! If you are not, you do not need to go into debt or lose your home to do so. Make this clear to your family and make sure they respect your situation.
8. All we want to do is spoil our grandkids rotten
Okay, maybe we give a lot of gifts, sneak in tons of treats, and provide constant hugs and cuddles, but that is only because we love our grandkids so darn much and want nothing more than to show them! Plus, it isn’t spoiling when you’re the grandma…
9. We aren’t cool
Um, excuse me? We lived through the British invasion, watched Elvis shake his hips on live television, AND rode around in VW Bugs and Buses. Not only are we cool, but far out and groovy!
There you have it: lies and rumors about grandmas that must be put to rest. Not all grandmas will have these same issues, but if you do, I hope this gives you a little solace (and gives those around you a dose of the truth). As always, thanks for being here, fellow grandma. Let’s talk again soon.