To The Grandmas Who Think They’re Failing, This Is For You

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Grandma takes her job VERY seriously, and who can blame her/us? We have been training our entire lives for this job, and we know better than anyone how to spoil and love our precious grandbabies. While we typically feel confident in our duties, there are times when doubt kicks in, and we feel inadequate, like maybe we are failing our families.

I am here to reassure you, dear grandma, that you are never failing – in fact, it’s quite the opposite! As long as you love unconditionally and keep them safe and well cared for, you are doing a fabulous job. I know how hard it is to grow older and have self-doubt creep in out of nowhere, so I want to lift and encourage you, my fellow grandma, and remind you that you are NOT failing. 

A woman smiling while looking out the window
Flickr/Kirt Edblom

Growing old is for the birds. I remember when I was a little girl and how old and wise my grandmother seemed. Now I am the grandma, and while I am old, I sure don’t feel too bright. However, when I sat down to think about it, I realized that maybe I am wiser than I give myself credit for, as I have many who come to me looking for advice. Does this sound familiar? That’s because you, too, are wise. You have beautiful ideas and ample life experience to share. 

Sure, we may not get around as well as we once did, but darn it, can we keep up with those little ones – the ones who can give us a surprising amount of energy the moment we see their precious face(s)! We can jump on the trampoline, play hide and seek, and push them high into the sky on the swings. Don’t let your self-doubt get you down, dear grandma – you are thriving at this gig!

Would you like to know something else? Where we see flaws, those grandbabies see utter perfections.

Do you see smile lines and wrinkly hands? They see a kind, friendly face, and soft, smooth skin.

Can you not run like you used to? Nah – you’re just letting them win, and they love you for it!

Do you fall asleep when you’re cuddled together for a movie? You’re just resting your eyes before your next big adventure.

They say you don’t want to spoil a child, but there is no such thing when you’re the grandma. No, I don’t mean spoiling them by never saying no and buying everything they ask for, but rather endless hugs and cuddles, letting them stay up a little past their bedtime (that’s when the best memories are made!), and whipping up a batch of their favorite dessert whether or not they asked. Why do I bring this up? It’s because you and I see those posts on social media that show friends and acquaintances taking their families on elaborate trips and transporting their grandkids around in their Lexus. Remember, my friend: social media is merely a highlight reel. Don’t let it get you down.

(As an aside, their chocolate chip cookies and brownies are nowhere as good as yours. Need I mention that you also microwave chicken nuggets and prepare Kraft mac and cheese better than a gourmet chef?)

You are enough.

You are setting an outstanding example for those kids.

Your grandkids love and adore you.

That’s all that matters.

Keep up the great work, my friend. 

I hope my words lift you up and help you see how incredible you are. Growing old is lovely, but it can sure be challenging, too. Keep doing what you’re doing, fellow Devoted Grandma! You are thriving, and I hope these words help you see yourself the way those grandkids do. 

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